The Germ Bags

We are a sick house – again. This time, Zuki has strep throat and Samu has Fifth disease. I know. That’s what I said. Leave it to Samu to come home with an illness I have to Google. Apparently, it also has to be reported to the Department of Health. So now I have to drag my ass back to the doctor’s office to sign a script that announces to the world that strange kids come home with strange diseases – the weirdo.

 

If they had something crippling, like the flu or a stomach virus, they’d be in bed. They’d be miserable, yes, but that’s what headphones are for. But my guys are not miserable. They’re fine – energetic – even. Samu has a tendency to get crazy when his health is imbalanced. I should thank my lucky stars that his illness doesn’t require antibiotics or worse: steroids. I’d have to chain him to the radiator for that.

 

I did get a kick out of the other name the doctor called it: Slap Cheek disease. His cheeks are bright pink and bumpy. His face is a little puffy, too. He looks like a clown, to be honest. An incessantly talking midget of a clown. It makes him the worst home school student.

 

“Samu, read the directions!” I said, for the seventeenth time.

 

“I can’t – it’s too funny!”

 

“JUST READ THEM.”

 

“Okay! HA, HA, HA. It says, HA, HA, HA, ‘read the para-ha, ha, ha – para-ha, ha, ha- paragraph……….Bwah, HA, HA, HA, haaaaa!”

 

If he’s an eighth this much a pain in the ass in school, then I feel bad that all I got his teacher for Christmas was a pair of cashmere gloves. She must want to slap me with them.

 

So, yeah – 2013…off to a great start.

First Period of Home Torture – ah, School
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Author: Namzola_Goodness

A Japanese-American who grew up in the streets of New York during the racially volatile 70's, Nami blogs with guts, heart and humor. Dysfunctional parenting, cynical citizenship and...love of beer to wash it all down.

12 thoughts on “The Germ Bags”

  1. Just this morning I was thinking how school will end soon! 2 more months and I’m homework,study period, battle of wills exercises-FREE. Soon!

    Samu does look like he is in the torture chamber! 😉

    Get well soon boys.
    Our sickness-in-the-house sked usually falls on November and December.
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  2. So sorry about your houseful of ick. Ours has been completely germ-ridden too…as in, I’m just getting over my SECOND case of the flu, along with a sinus infection, on top of a freakin’ CRACKED RIB, which makes coughing and sneezing soooo much fun, lemme tell ya. And now Miles has the flu. The universe is totally hating on us right now. Worst winter ever. But enough about me. Hope your home is germ-free and slap cheek free asap.
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  3. Poor you!

    Hope the boys recover. Actually, there’s no doubt in my mind they will.

    Our house has been infected with viruses too. Both my wife and me are desperately trying to recover from our illnesses. She’s had a nasty cough for over two weeks, coupled with a snotty nose and watery eyes. I’m suffered from a throat infection.

    But I must admit, the drugs are great (prescription drugs!). Solved all our problems.
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