We are a sick house – again. This time, Zuki has strep throat and Samu has Fifth disease. I know. That’s what I said. Leave it to Samu to come home with an illness I have to Google. Apparently, it also has to be reported to the Department of Health. So now I have to drag my ass back to the doctor’s office to sign a script that announces to the world that strange kids come home with strange diseases – the weirdo.
If they had something crippling, like the flu or a stomach virus, they’d be in bed. They’d be miserable, yes, but that’s what headphones are for. But my guys are not miserable. They’re fine – energetic – even. Samu has a tendency to get crazy when his health is imbalanced. I should thank my lucky stars that his illness doesn’t require antibiotics or worse: steroids. I’d have to chain him to the radiator for that.
I did get a kick out of the other name the doctor called it: Slap Cheek disease. His cheeks are bright pink and bumpy. His face is a little puffy, too. He looks like a clown, to be honest. An incessantly talking midget of a clown. It makes him the worst home school student.
“Samu, read the directions!” I said, for the seventeenth time.
“I can’t – it’s too funny!”
“JUST READ THEM.”
“Okay! HA, HA, HA. It says, HA, HA, HA, ‘read the para-ha, ha, ha – para-ha, ha, ha- paragraph……….Bwah, HA, HA, HA, haaaaa!”
If he’s an eighth this much a pain in the ass in school, then I feel bad that all I got his teacher for Christmas was a pair of cashmere gloves. She must want to slap me with them.
So, yeah – 2013…off to a great start.